Lies, Damn Lies

Badminton and badgers

I was going to blog about badminton but I am now certain I have in the past. And it wasn't interesting then. It probably talked about how unfit I am (and I am), and how badminton is practically the only sport I can do, and even during that I tend to almost die during it.

So badgers. I mention badgers only because of a piece of graffiti I noticed today by a young student saying "dave f8cks badgers and hedgehogs" (without the 8). I noticed it partially because it was so large, partially because I was tempted to (and did) add squirrells to it, and partly because I was kind of wondering why there was the need for an "and hedgehogs". Assuming that said graffiti artist is not actually telling the truth, in which case he should probably stop writing on the desk and start phoning the police, he must be trying to insult Dave. In which case, surely telling the world that he copulates with badgers is not enough. Apparently not. Apparently in said graffiti artists mind, this insult will only be of note if hedghogs are added to it. Admittedly hedgehogs are surely the more difficult creature to violate, although I must admit the prospect of trying it on with an adult badger is probably an uninviting one. Well, to be honest getting it on with any non human is a little uninviting to be honest, but badgers are fiery creatures.

'Course I always remember Badgers as the awesome creatures of war that they are in
Brian Jacques "Redwall" series, but they are probably not like that. In fact, I'm going to say definitely- no badger has ever wielded a wace. Or a mouse beat a cat in armed combat, for that matter, as happens in one memorable battle, although I seem to remember imaging all these creatures as being roughly in proportion to each other in my messed up child head. Douglas Adams despaired of that sort of thing, I seem to imagine, as does Terry Pratchett. Ferrets in waistcoats, or something similar.

I also said I would talk about Betelgeuse, and other than being one of the few stars that not only gets to be the home planet of a celebrated character of comic fiction and also the villian of an amusing Tim Burton film (ok, the ONLY one), I don't have that much to say about it. I'm not even sure what type of star it is, not that that would mean anything to anyone other than a physics student....

posted by Mr K @ 7:26 pm