Tuesday, August 16, 2005


So.... I went to a party last night. It was fancy dress, so I went as a sheep wizard.

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That mask is one of the scariest things ever made. Its also really rather poor at providing vision, meaning that if one tries to wear it, one will tend to walk into walls. I ended up wearing it on the back of my head. I paid for my extravagence in the amount of alchohol I drunk by feeling absolutely awful today- fair quantities of the alchohol have now returned back to the wild.. so far the count is four....

I have two things I have to do today. First, I have to email this on the old list that I used to send it round on, as I promised to last night, and two, to talk about smoking, pedestrians and poetry.

Smoking is a bizzare habit, because I can't work out how one gets started. I have never smoked before, but whenever people have their first smoke, they cough and choke. Or at least, so Grease and Grange Hill tell me, and I have never known them to lie to me before. I suppose, like alchohol, you just go with it in the hope to get used to it. I can understand starting smoking at a young age- the impressionable teen, trying to impress his friends by destroying his lungs, but starting at the age of 20 so really is quite poor. Its pretty hard to miss the ludicrous amount of warnings about how smoking will make you die young. 20 or 30 years before you would go normally, which is really quite a bit. But what the hey, people are free to do what they like.. if you want to become a social pariah, go for it!

Pedestrians. I'm really quite fond of them, because I am one, being unable to drive, not because of any particular incompetence, but, because of the usual excuse, laziness meaning I have never taken lessons. Motorists hate pedestrians, because pedestrians slow them down. Whenever one halts a car by darting out ahead of it, they shake their fist because you have prevented them from getting to their location. You should feel ashamed. The worst is when it is raining, and horrible, and you are getting soaked, but the stupid motorists in their stupid safe little cars won't slow down to let you pass. Some SCUM will even attempt to splash water on you. Seriously, people who do that deserve pain....

Poetry. I am not a natual poet, although I have written a few poems in my time. My favourite style for writing is blank verse, because you can get away with pretty much anything. Some of the classic poems have a vague rhyming scheme, but its very poor, so they will cheat and not rhyme on various lines. I don't think this should be allowed. There should be a commision that checks all poems, and if they decide to have a rhyming scheme, they have to do it. My world would be a glorious one.....


At 11:38 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think the waving of the fist at darting pedestrians is less from slowing down and more for almost killing you and guilt anger etc...and, lets be fair, said motorist WOULD always be blamed!
also, its because they hate you K.

That's right I'm back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At 12:22 am, Blogger Kirbie said...

I used to hate pedestrians, but now I hate other motorists more, less driving in towns I guess.
My mum just gave up smoking last week or so and my dad's stopped for over a year now, so woo to them. I no longer sneeze when going downstairs. I never thought my mum would stop, but one excuse was that it was now too much of a pain to smoke, as like you said you are a pariah. lol.
Err oh ye, finally I generally dislike poetry (though some I dol like - ones that rhyme usually because that's a proper poem, poems that don't rhyme are just down to laziness!).
The reason I have a natural dislike towards poetry is thanks to Ted Hughes (I hate the fucker!) all because of one poem called Harvest Moon - it sucked and I had to recite it once. I didn't win, but got a certificate saying i came something like 32nd. Git!


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